Scottish League Division 3
	Queen's Park	3
	Weatherston, Quinn, Ferry
	Elgin City	0
Saturday, October 21, 2006

Last time Homer was in our spiritual home, Scotland were giving it to France, big-time. What a wonderful day, and night. Sunday morning could have been a tad less painful, mind you (I blame Gulliver and the Big Bar Steward).

But what the heck, a small price to pay for witnessing history first hand, and few and far between are those opportunities these days.
Homer is mature enough - no, he is, really - to remember when history-making days at Hampden were more common-place; at least it seemed that way in one's youth, like sun-kissed summers and caramel cake and pink custard.
Real Madrid v Eintracht Frankfurt, by common consent the greatest-ever match at this great stadium; John Greig's piledriver to shock Italy (watched from the middle of the west terracing with school pal Innes Campbell, who realised too late he suffered from claustrophobia); Celtic beating the might of Don Revie's Leeds United; Kenny Dalglish nutmegging Ray Clemence; Tam Forsyth's crunching tackle on Mick Channon; Peter Buchanan's love affair with referees; Ross Caven's crunching tackles on everybody.
Gulliver was perhaps even more fortunate; he was a ballboy during some of the aforementioned. Homer thought Gulliver had made a comeback when France coach Raymond Domenech complained about the ''boy balls'' after Thierry and Co had been put to the broadsword. As Walter Smith confirmed later, the Queen's Park ballboys and our delightful ballgirl Ms Gordon were "terrific''. Couldn't have been old Gulliver, then.
But I digress (and don't complain, I could yet bore you with tales of the finest team in Europe at the time, the Lisbon Lions, conceding three goals to the original Hoops at Parkhead; or Malky Mackay's stunning scoring debut; or the countless opponents Malky stunned; where do you think the term Malkied came from, for goodness sake?).
But those highlights were not at Hampden, and again I digress. We were discussing 1-0 against France, the return of the Hampden Roar, the confirmation if any were needed that this special place is the only true home of our national game.You want atmosphere?
Which brings me to Brian Irvine, a fine, upstanding man and the manager of today's opponents Elgin City.
A rugged central defender in his day - with the accent on rugged, if Homer may say so and Brian will permit - he had the honour of striding these cherished acres with Aberdeen and with Scotland in the early 1990s. He didn't need our ''rebirth'' against France to know what it means to play here. And it is that knowledge he says he will try to impart to his players today by way of inspiration.
(So you're finally getting to today's action, then?)
Homer is tired typing it, and you dear reader - assuming you are still with me - are equally tired of hearing it, but every team gets a lift playing at Hampden Park (even France; they got a lift to the airport).
This week Irvine, an erudite man, was making just that point. It was on obvious plank on which to base a team talk - like pinning on the dressing room wall the derogatory newspaper remarks of some future opponent - but when you are trying to motivate a team that only last week collected their first win of the season and, whisper it, are even below the Shire, well, nothing ventured, eh?
But does he realise this is Queen's Park he's talking about? Does he appreciate that there are many in this parish not convinced that the granny has been lifted by Elgin's first victory of the season last week, achieved with a 5-0 thumping of the said Shire.
So Queen's cannot now extend to this season's early also-rans, namely Elgin, our traditional gift of a first three points which is normally reserved for Shire. Thank goodness for that, we all cried. But wait. Elgin haven't won an away game all season. Cue fresh panic.
So what's the problem? We're on the back of a 3-0 win over league leaders East Fife and a victory at Arbroath. The problem is the game sandwiched in between - a defeat at, whisper it, the Shire. You know, maybe we should sign Frodo Baggins, at least he could control the Shire.
What Billy Stark is trying to control within his young squad is the ability, as he says in today's programme, to bridge the gap between winning and losing.
We can beat any team in the league, but you have to maintain that form for 90 minutes - every game.
The win at Arboath was terrific, and all the more commendable because it was achieved without three main strikers - Weatherston, Carroll and Dunn.
Billy Stark enthused about the contribution of Richard Bowers and today, with Weatherston back but Ronald joining Carroll and Dunn on the sidelines, he teamed young Richard up with Weatherston. A pacy front line and no mistake, but would they get the service to allow their pace to punish the Elgin rearguard?
That was the only change from the Gayfield victors, but the players faced very differerent conditions. Where Gayfield had been bright and breezy, Hampden was grey and grotty. Not the kind of day keepers relish, and one that called for safe hands.
We had to wait just 12 seconds to see the first glimpse of Bowers' as he sneaked onto a ball from weatherston and was promptly upended as he left Easton in his wake. The free-kick came to less than nothing, sadly.
The absurdity of the new offside rule was suitably demonstrated after just two minutes. Easton was around four miles offside as the ball came though, but as he made no attempt to play it, he was "not active". He soon became active when Johnston's knockback left him in acres of spece, but thankfully his shot went wide.
With three minutes on the clock, Weatherston marked his return in fine style. Heeacted first to the through ball and cool as you like lobbed the large figure of Renton.
The slippy conditions made sure chances were going to be created ta both ends and Queen's then had to survive a few edgy moments, most noticable when Campbell rattled Cairns' crossbar from the corner of the box.
Then it was our turn, and two glorious chances made and missed within a few seconds just on the 10 minute mark.
First up was a glorious flowing move involving Paton and Kettlewell, who laid it on a plate for Bowers. Sadly the finish failed to match the lead up play. Paton then slid a delightful ball to Kettlewell who steadied himself, took aim, and fired right into the side net.
Queen's were looking potent going forward, but Homer was beginning to worry about the missed opportunities. There was always the feeling that Martin Johnston wouldn't be so generous if a similar opportunity presented itself at the other end.
Despite the nagging fears, one couldn't help but admire the quality of some of the pass-and-go we were producing. Dare Homer say Les Bleus would have been hard pushed to supply prettier patterns?
Ironically, a bit of the old route one gave us the next chance after 18 minutes. A punt upfield, a header on by Kettlewell and Weatherston's pace took him in on goal. His left foot finish was well placed, but keeper Renton did just enough to deny him.
The pressure was building, and Reilly was next to lose out when his powerful drive after a corner was blocked on its way to goal.
Cairns showed sure hands when he clutched a nasty effort from Dempsie, but still the tide flowed towards the Elgin goal.
Young Paul Paton was showing the best and worst of Queen's all at the same time. His energy and ball-winning was exemplary, but too often the final ball was careless in the extreme.
Our pace had won a number of free-kicks in and around the box but we hadn't made full use of them. We squandered another after 30 minutes when Trouten hit the wall and Quinn's follow-up was blocked.
Homer has seen Queen's dominate before and be punished for our failings in front of goal. But seldom have we been so much in control with so little to show for it.
One going on six was an appropriate description of the scoreline as Weatherston headed over from Ferry's cross on 37 minutes. In fairness to the youngster, the wee dunt he got in the back just as he jumped did him no favours.
Elgin won a couple of corners as they tried to get a toehold in the game and the second one resulted in an allmighty scramble before the ball was finally hoofed clear.
With half-time looming, the sun made it's first appearance of the afternoon. We could only hope it was a hint of better things to come as the game had shown worrying signs of fizzling out.

Half-time 1-0

Elgin came out more fire up after the break, in truth they could hardly have been as ineffective again. Queen's repelled the early threat and were soon back making and missing chances. Dunlop was the first culprit, heading over when he should at least have hit the target.

Although Elgin had picked up a couple of bookings, there had been little sign of aggro in the game, until a little flare-up after 55 minutes. Mick Dunlop's boot was a bit high, but a foul would have been more than enough punishment had Kaczan not reacted angrily. Needless to say, the moment he did that, both players went in the book.

Elgin tried to change things with a couple of substitutions, Finigan and Dochert replacing Moffat and Gardiner.

The changes almost paid swift dividends when Queen's got in a tangle at the back. Thankfully the slip went unpunished.

Steve Canning replaced Bowers just before the hour and could have made an immediate impact when he burst through. His drive was firm enough, but missed the target and yet another entry went into the could-have-been column.

Mark Ferry was next to go close with a fine drive from distance, then Paton made an entry into an unwelcome column, the ref's book. The youngster was fouled, but lunged to try and make the recovery.

He couldn't argue about the yellow card, but neither could Elgin complain about the referee giving the foul to Queen's for the original infringement. And this time Paton responded in the ideal manner swinging in a dangerous cross that Canning headed towards goal. His effort was headed into the air by Dickson, but Tony Quinn and David Weatherston reacted quickest and Quinn nodded the ball home. Sixty-five minutes on the clock and the margin was at least a bit more realistic.

Referee Brown incurred the wrath of the home fans when he failed to give the striker the penalty he was seeking. He survived a couple of foul challenges before going down in the box. It would have been a soft award, but the booking for diving was equally harsh.

Maybe that was on David's mind a couple of minutes later when he chased down keeper Renton and forced the error. But with the hard part done, he then scuffed a feeble effort back into the grateful Elgin man's hands.

The could-have-been column was looking a bit embarrassing by now.

And the scoreline could have become farcical after 73 minutes had Mark Cairns not reacted superbly to race off his line and clear from Johnston as the big man closed in on a woeful backpass. Queen's were so far ahead that if this was a boxing match the referee would have stopped the bout to avoid more punishment. But incidents like this reminded us just how quickly it could all change.

After missing so many good chances it was ironic that the third goal when it came was probably the worst strike we had come up with. Again the lead-up work was sweet, with Trouen and Weatherston tearing the visiting defence apart down the right. The cut-back to Ferry was also perfect, but the midfielder got his shot all wrong and watched embarrassed as it bounced into the ground and found its way into the corner of the net.

Seventy-nine minutes gone; 3-0; surely even Queen's wouldn't have any problems now?

In truth, we cruised to the line, although we had a wee scare when Johnston found space to get off a shot that hit the post and bounced wide.

With a couple of minutes to go Billy Stark brought on Tommy Murray and Paul Cairney to replace Weatherston and Ferry.

They had little chance to get involved before the referee brought proceedings to a close. The result was more than satisfactory; the football in places was a joy and the workrate produced by every player was simply remarkable.

But, and it's a great big but, we wont get away with missing chances like that again.

Finally, don't be misled by the crime count in tomorrow's papers. There might have been eight bookings in today's game, but there wasn't a foul worthy of the name. Homer just hopes our card count doesn't come back to haunt us at a later stage in the season.